Caregiving: Sick of Being Asked Who Will Care for You When You Get Old? | Emily Paulsen & Pamela D. Wilson
Most of the time, conversations about caregiving happen when something has already gone wrong. A hospital is discharging a loved one. A diagnosis has just landed. A sudden fall changes everything. And in those moments, decisions are made quickly, often under pressure, with limited options. In this week’s episode of Curious Life of a Childfree Woman, I spoke with Pamela D. Wilson, an international caregiving expert, advocate, and speaker with over 25 years of experience guiding people through the legal, financial, emotional, and deeply personal realities of care. Together, we explored what it might look like to make those decisions long before they’re urgent, while there’s still space for clarity, choice, and alignment with the life you actually want.
Pamela has seen it all: families blindsided by sudden needs, solo adults wondering who will speak for them, siblings divided over what “should” happen next. Her perspective is clear, proactive planning isn’t just about logistics, it’s about self-definition. The plan you create says something about your priorities, your boundaries, and the kind of life you want to protect, even when you can’t speak for yourself. Whether it’s identifying a trusted medical power of attorney, documenting your preferences for care, or exploring professional fiduciary options, Pamela emphasizes that the earlier you take these steps, the more control you retain over your future.
Care Isn’t Just Practical, It’s Personal
One of the most striking parts of our conversation was how much caregiving planning is really about relationships, both with others and with yourself. We tend to think of care in purely functional terms: appointments, medications, living arrangements. But Pamela reframed it as an act of care for the people you love. Having a plan means your partner, siblings, or friends aren’t left guessing. It means they have the resources, instructions, and confidence to act on your behalf without the added weight of uncertainty.
We also talked about the realities for childfree and solo individuals. Without children as an assumed default for future care, your network might look different, closer friends, extended family, professional services. Building that network intentionally, before you need it, allows you to choose the right people and structures for your life. It’s not just about who can step in, but who you want to. And as Pamela reminded me, that choice matters.
Curious About Planning Your Care? Start Here.
If this episode sparked a desire to feel more prepared, here are a few ways to start this week:
Identify your decision-maker: Choose the person you’d trust to make medical decisions for you, and make sure they understand your values and preferences.
Secure your legal foundation: Research and complete the essential documents for your state, including medical and financial power of attorney, living will, and a will or trust.
Clarify where you want care: Decide whether you’d prefer to receive care at home, in a specific community, or through professional services, and plan for it now.
Explore professional support options: Look into fiduciary or care management services in your area, especially if you live alone or far from family.
Protect your resources early: Consider long-term care insurance while you’re healthy to ensure you have both financial coverage and more choices later in life.
Let’s Stay Curious Together
This episode reminded me that caregiving isn’t just a role, it’s a relationship shaped by choice, preparation, and trust. Whether you’re planning for your own future or supporting someone else, the work you do now can turn an overwhelming crisis into a navigable moment.
You can listen to the full conversation with Pamela D. Wilson on Curious Life of a Childfree Woman wherever you get your podcasts.
I’d love to hear from you, what’s one step you’re ready to take to make your future care feel more intentional?
Share with me on Instagram @curiouslifeofachildfreewoman. Let’s stay curious together.
